Confessing Your Troubles

This episode sets the stage for other podcasts to come as it delivers a deep-rooted area of life that most may try to deflect. It is engineered with a knowledgeable understanding and compassionate tone concerning confession your troubles with guidance, informative details, examples and so much more.

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It's About How You Connect - The Mind

Alway's Keeping it Real - Coach Brenda

Transcript

RECORDED TRANSCRIPT

Brenda Rockward Coaching LLC

Brenda Rockward – Life Coach & Life Skills Author

Confessing Your Troubles – Podcast

 October 7, 20205

“Hello and Welcome to my podcast “Redesign and Brand Your Life.”

My name is Brenda Rockward-Life Coach and Life Skills Author. But as a short title- I usually go by Coach Brenda.

As part of my disclaimer concerning all topics of my podcasts noted to all listeners and followers of my podcasts now and into the future that Brenda Rockward Coaching LLC is not and does not institute that you (listeners and followers) entertain any contents of my podcasts or other creative material. If you choose to do so, you do so at your own discretion.

If you are a new listener, check out the Introduction episode where you learn a little about me and my business as well as an impartial disclaimer. Visit my website for full terms and conditions at www.lifeskillsauthor.com 

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  TOPIC

Today’s topic is on  “Confessing Your Troubles.” This unique topic is an impromptu to a host of other real-life topics to follow in future podcasts. The reason I am choosing to start with this topic first is because it’s part of a pre-image self-view. What that means is that in every part of our lives we all have tendency for needing clarification and for clearing up negative debris in our lives but may still lack efforts in and how we communicate. This pre-image self-view relates to how we engage in the world and with each other. More on this later. 

For now, let’s develop an understanding of what the terms: Confess and Trouble mean. 

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TERMS DEFINED

According to Dictionary.com, the definition for “Confess” means -To own or admit as true, and the definition for “Trouble”- is a state or condition of distress, annoyance, difficulty. 

How do you think the general population would define these terms? How would you define the terms related to the clarification and debris in your life?

Confessing your troubles can stir up a lot of emotions like feeling guilty, angry, scared and ashamed to name a few. So, as you see, the definitions do correlate with our daily emotions and how we eject them.

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 Knowing the definitions and emotions that become evident some may ask… Why then Confess Your Troubles?

This is a great, great question!

Confessing your troubles can lift away a lot of the stresses that come from internalizing those troubles. The stresses usually lay dormant in you and then blast off at the worst time.

You know what I’m talking about! 

Those times when a person might say something to you about something (this is a triggering moment) that digs deep inside you and then suddenly you blast off with certain words that were probably sitting quietly within your mind for a while. Now, those words are spoken into the universe, to that person or people you proclaimed it. You feel me?

Many of us have experienced this type of feeling and have been in blasting situations- so it’s common.

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 Now, one of the big questions I know most are wondering about…

is whether confessing your troubles wrong?

It depends on how you look at it as well as how you carry it out if you choose to do so.

Are you confessing your troubles with no intent of changing them or are you confessing your troubles to heal and make better and do better for a possible positive outcome to whatever situation you are in? 

Do you understand the difference here? 

In other words, do not blow out stifling air with thoughts of selfishness and unfeeling, and also hoping to gain something from it. If you are going to do it, do it with a healthy state of mind with no intentions so you receive healing from it, learning from it and moving upward. It is a work of consistency and maintenance if you will.

Let’s weigh in further on some perspectives for you to consider that may help you diversify how to approach confessing your troubles if you decide.

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 So, what does confessing your troubles do?

 We all wear different faces when it deals with confessing our troubles. 

You know how you go into some medical facilities, and they have a sheet with diagrammatic faces on it for you to circle indicating how you feel that day- like happy, sad, or depressed.

 We can wear a stoic look on our face which may indicate a full-uncontrolled blast just waiting to happen), meaning you are holding something in. Then, there can be an upside-down frown indicating a saddened expression related to whatever the trouble might be, or we can have a smile on our face that could go either way meaning we might be internalizing and not showing it yet appearing happy but not completely free of the feeling.

Confessing releases the intense grip of our fight or flight thoughts and feelings so that we can start to handle things a little easier (which is our acceptance of those things or situations and moving upward).

What we speak of ourselves can easily become true too…placed in the forefront. Meaning, it is either our acceptance or denial of how we look at ourselves and how we may choose to relate to others. 

Which end would you rather be associated?

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 Another important question in confessing your troubles…

Is WHO DOES IT HELP?

It helps from an individual perspective and may also help someone else (the person we may be confessing our troubles)…, and hopefully the ones you confess your troubles to are not the judgmental type). LAUGH

Yes! I know most people are probably saying well, much of the world can be judgmental Coach Brenda. Hey, I get it, we all have tendencies to do this either consciously or subconsciously. Think back to the blasting off period on this.

Remember though, that only you can decide to make a positive change whether you meet up with judgmental folk or not. 

As I have heard many say, in several types of situations…,It takes a village…, 

So, flip that script and look at yourself first before engaging the village.

It begins with you.

Troubles are going to be just that. However, it is in how you choose to intercept them and make the change. 

 Are you going to point the finger at someone, be the-ALL IN YOUR FACE! person or be the one making concessions and building a constructive positive flow in your relationships where you live, work and play?

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 Coming on down the slope…HOW DOES Confessing Your Troubles  HELP?

In a negative view confessing your troubles can represent a trash can full of what you don’t care to have- it is the remains of something but not the actual thing. 

Or it can represent two thumbs up, indicating a strong arm of positivity.

 Confessing your troubles allows you to visualize, assess and associate the good points and the bad points of your troubles. 

The more you do this, the more you build confidence in yourself and develop trust in yourself and then move upward to begin the stages of trusting in sharing the confession your troubles with another person or people. 

However, if your troubles are causing a lot of mental anguish in ways that may be harmful mentally, emotionally, or physically to yourself or to others then you may need to entrust yourself in talking with a professional therapist, mental health provider or counselor to help resolve any troubles. Remember, I am a Life Coach and do not carry these professional medical titles.

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 Ok listeners…KICK-OFF Time!

We are looking at the “How and Benefits” respectively to confessing your troubles to others.

For starters, it might be best to try not to unload all your confessions at once please as this could end up being too much information way to fast to digest for the person or people receiving this information.

Start off slowly and extract one trouble at a time (break it into parts if necessary). Pace the confessions out and set the tone and atmosphere (if applicable). Remember the person at the listening end receiving the information must also digest what you are saying. This includes you at the opposite end of the receiving line after giving a confession of your troubles. Some people confess their troubles to God, to Clergy or others they respect and trust, and feel that those individuals are indeed trustworthy. In either case take baby steps… slowly build your way when you are ready.

Here is a concept to further help you diversify how you might journey during your confession periods. For you and confessing your troubles to someone else…think of it like the demolition of a home that is too close to other structures. 

It must be handled delicately. For example, the internal surfaces can be broken down first, then an outer layer, then another outer layer until all the layers of it have been stripped away. Just the shell may be left. However, the shell can be REDESIGNED and built stronger than before once the old layers are stripped away. 

This is how you may confess your troubles to others without coming on to strong. It shows aptitude, control, and other positive communications like clarity, honesty, compassion, empowerment, and confidence within yourself that will be valuable for future discussions where you live, work and play.

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 Segue

Remember confessing your troubles will not be easy or even painless depending on what the confession is about, and you should never seek to gain anything from it. If you do this, it means you have learned nothing and need to reassess because confessing your troubles doesn’t always mean you are in a WIN-WIN position. When you confess your troubles, you are opening the door of vulnerability and allowing the pressures and stresses from the confession to be free from your person and hopefully finding yourself less irritable, having less anxiety or guilt to name a few examples. And, if you are with a significant other, perhaps less of those things or situations interfering in the relationship or other environments (if applicable). 

Remember, you can have rigid or non-rigid developments of sustainability which means your thoughts and beliefs remain hindered or your thoughts and beliefs transform and get across the evolution of change and clarity takes place. You are no longer an imprisonment of yourself. 

And as an added application tool…get rid of “Pocket Lingerers” too. This term is taken from my book - Being in Relationships-How Not to Feel Alone in the Presence of Your Partner. A Self-Help Book for Women and Men. The term means negative events and baggage from previous times and that which likes to hover around inside us and try to block anything positive in our path.

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 Recap

In closing to this podcast about “Confessing Your Troubles,” it depicts the essence of confessing your troubles to bring about positive change within the person (you), and the person receiving the confessions if applicable. It allows for transformation and empowerment, thus, learning how to adapt and change and manage those troubles in life that hinder production, hinder living and feeling positive, confident, and free. The individual gets a new take on life with new vision through new lenses of ideal perspectives so that a stronger mindset set and REDESIGNING of your language around thought and behavior becomes more solid the more you become non-rigid…building confidence, trust, openness and more.

Again, to recap my disclaimer concerning all topics of my podcasts noted to all listeners and followers of my podcasts now and into the future that Brenda Rockward Coaching LLC is not and does not institute that you (listeners and followers) entertain any contents of my podcasts or other creative material. If you choose to do so, you do so at your own discretion. View full terms and conditions at www.lifeskillsauthor.com

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 Call to action

Feel free to follow me on my website at www.lifeskillsauthor.com to view my other coaching genres and upcoming events. 

 Check me out on: Instagram and Pinterest as lifeskillsauthor, and my YouTube handle @anywherelifeskills for more tidbits, learning resources, motivation, and inspiration. 

Until our next podcast! 

 It’s How You Connect-The Mind. 

This is Coach Brenda-Life Coach & Life Skills Author 

- “Alway’s Keeping it Real” 

 Thank you all for listening!

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 REFERENCES

 Dictionary.com. Researched definition of the term “Confess” defined. https://www.dictionary.com/

 Dictionary.com. Researched definition of the term “Trouble” defined. https://www.dictionary.com/

 Rockward, Brenda (2017-2019). “Pocket Lingerer’s” Being in Relationships…How Not to Feel Alone in the Presence of Your Partner. A Self-Help Book for Women and Men. Brenda Rocwkard Coaching LLC. Coach Brenda. Life Skills Author. Quotation created, explained, defined.